Miscarriage/Stillbirth
Children without parents are called “orphans,” a person who loses their spouse is called a “widow” or a “widower,” but there is no word to describe a person who has lost a child. Miscarriage is defined as the natural death of a foetus or embryo before it is viable to survive outside the womb (up to about 20 weeks). After that time the loss is considered a stillbirth. It is estimated that 1 in 5 pregnancies end in miscarriage, usually within the first trimester. The sadness, anxiety, and guilt that can accompany the loss of pregnancy may seem insurmountable! You are not alone. Though your grieving is unique, it is sometimes helpful to share it with others who know what you are going through. Wellington Miscarriage Support Group meets monthly, and additional resources can be found at www.miscarriage.org.nz
There is actual, physical pain associated with miscarriage, and the hormonal and emotional shifts in your body can amplify and intensify that pain. It is important to seek out support to help you heal and grieve if you or your partner are not able to cope with the loss on your own.